It's Valentine's Day — Spread the Love

Valentine's Day is not everyone's favorite holiday. Fair enough. It’s sort of silly to think we’re all going to spontaneously feel romantic on the same day each year, whether or not there’s anyone in our lives we’d like to share that feeling with. And trying to get reservations — and a babysitter — on the same day as everyone else sounds suspiciously like mandatory fun.

But the basic idea — of dedicating a holiday to love — is pretty easy to get behind. Plus, there are plenty of ways to show you care that don’t involve overpriced ‘specials’ menus. Instead, why not make an extra effort to spread the love to friends, family members, perfect strangers, and of course, yourself? Some ideas:

For your family:

• If you feel the need for a celebratory dinner, take out the fancy dishes and the cloth napkins. Then order sushi and drink champagne. Or pizza and beer.

• Send Valentine’s cards or notes to younger family members, who will get a kick out of receiving a real live letter, addressed to them. If you have kids, help them create Valentine’s cards for older family members.

• Tell your family members one thing you love about them.

For friends and colleagues:

• Bring in some sweet treats for your co-workers. It’s been a while since the holidays provided a steady stream of free food.

• Call your best girlfriend and go out to dinner at the most unromantic Irish pub you can find.

• Offer to babysit for a friend who could really use a break.

• Send an email to someone who hasn't heard from you recently and restart the conversation. They will love hearing from you, and isn't that what Valentine's Day is really all about?

Random acts of kindness for strangers:

• Leave a big tip.

• Help the tourist who is woefully unable to use your city’s mass transit system – and is messing up everyone’s rush hour commute

• Help the family that is struggling to get up the subway stairs with a stroller.

• Buy a cup of coffee, or breakfast, for the next street person who asks you for money.

For yourself:

• Read All About Love: New Visions by bell hooks. I know bell hooks is not everyone’s cup of tea, and you may prefer your discussions of love to steer clear of discussions of patriarchy and politics. But after reading All About Love, you will never hear the phrase “love is a verb” quite the same way again. In her signature uncompromising style, hooks gives us a clear vision of love, and of what it requires.

• Curl up on the couch with a favorite book. If you don't have a favorite, we've got a list of books we like to reread. If none of those suit your mood, try anything by Stephen King.

• Watch a great movie. Before there was George Clooney, there was Cary Grant. And in Sleepless in Seattle, screenwriter Nora Ephron picked An Affair to Remember with Cary Grant and Deborah Kerr as the ultimate "chick flick." It's a tear jerker about a rendezvous between two lovers at the Empire State Building that goes awry, although the film ultimately delivers a happy ending. But Grant did a better job in a few other films: Bringing Up Baby and The Philadelphia Story, both with Kathryn Hepburn; To Catch a Thief, with Grace Kelly; Charade, with Audrey Hepburn; and Father Goose, with Leslie Caron. (Note: While one of us will be watching Cary Grant, the other will be watching comedian Louis C.K. Just sayin’).

• Two words: day spa. If you can't take the whole day, then just get your nails or done or have your hair styled. If that doesn’t appeal to you, then how about a massage?

• Get out of bed early, put on some warm clothes and comfy slippers and enjoy a cup of your favorite hot beverage in the brisk morning air. Just you, the birds and maybe a rogue squirrel.

• Plan a trip — and book it. There's nothing wrong with delayed gratification.

• Do something — anything — that you've always wanted to do. It doesn't have to be big, like climb Mt. Everest. Just something that will make you smile and feel good about yourself and life. — KW and CG

Heart image courtesy of flickr user trustypics  

Cary Grant publicity still courtesy of Dr. Macro via Wikimedia Commons